“Baldy” I yelled at my neighbourhood boy, but he didn’t respond though I was sure that he heard me. “Hey baldy boy” I yelled again indicating that I'm not going to leave him till he reacts to me. He turned at me in response though he said nothing, but his face revealed it all! He felt insulted and thus I scored a point over him. I'm a teenager searching for troubles, I want some action in my life so I provoked and insulted other boys of my age.  I used my creativity in calling names, missing school and collecting cigarettes.  

So when I spotted this lean boy with a shaved head in my neighbourhood, I instantly tried to pickup a fight with him, but he didn’t respond to my challenge.  Whenever I called him ‘baldy’ he sadly looked at me and moved away.  I knew that he was hurt, but that’s what my aim was! One day I spotted him before my house and cried in excitement “Hey baldy! Are you going for a haircut?” he said nothing as usual and moved on with dampened eyes.  As I entered my house proud with my little victory in insulting the boy, I saw my mother standing at the main door, ‘she probably heard my squeals and would scold me for my bad manners’ – I thought, but rather she asked me with a grim face “Do you know why his hair is removed?”

“Why not! He might have been to a pilgrimage” I answered rudely. “No!” mother shouted with anguish “he is undergoing chemotherapy, he is in the final stages of cancer” I was shocked to hear those words, I'm not an adult but still knew what they meant; cancer, pain, chemotherapy, advanced stages, death…I felt so guilty at my behaviour that I've decided to apologise that boy, the next time I see him.

It’s been a week since I've seen him and was desperate to meet him and make him my friend, but he's no where in the sight.  Their house was locked and his cycle was chained to the bars. “He’s dead” mother said at the breakfast that day “he’s dead last night after a week long struggle in the ICU” Tears rolled from my eyes with guilt and compassion, I remembered the last time I’ve seen him; I’ve insulted him in front of my house! I remembered his gloomy face hurt with my comments and eyes dampened with the insult. I couldn’t have saved him from his inevitable death but could have brightened his short life by invoking some joy and hope. I've realised thereafter that true victory lies in winning hearts rather than defeating people.

- K.L.Surya.