Wife (on the phone): Where the hell are you, jerk?

Husband: Darling, you remember that jewellery shop where you saw that necklace and totally fell in love with it and I didn’t have money that time and I told you, “Baby, it’ll be yours one day!”

Wife: Suddenly in a soft polite voice “Yeah, yeah, I remember, my love!”

Husband: I am at the bar just next to that shop!

Wife: Go to hell, you jerk!