Husband & Wife Jokes

******************

Husband & Wife – Come Home Late

A woman was complaining to the neighbour that her husband always came home

late, no matter how she tried to stop him.

"Take my advice," said the neighbour,

"and do what I did. Once my husband came home at three o'clock in the morning,

and from my bed I called out:

"Is that you, Jim?" And that cured him.

"Cured him !" asked the woman,

"but how?" The neighbour said,

" You see, his name is Bill ."

**************

Husband & Wife – Why Divorce

In a divorce court a woman requested the judge: "Your honor, I want to divorce my

husband."

"But why ?" asked the judge.

She replied, "Because he is not faithful to me."

The judge asked, "How do you know ?"

She replied, " My lord, not a single child resembles him ."

*******************

Husband & Wife – Love Your Enemy

From his death bed, the husband called his wife and said,

"One month after I die I want you to marry Samy."

"Samy! But he is your enemy !"

"Yes, I know that ! I've suffered all these years so let him suffer now ."

Husband & Wife – Wedding Ring

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another,

"Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger? "

The other replied, " Yes I am, I married the wrong man. "

******************

Husband & Wife – Why

" Dad, I was away for a week. Yesterday I sent a fax to my wife I'd be home that

night, and when I got into my room I found my wife in another man's arms.

" Why, Dad ? Tell me why!"

Dad kept silent for a few minutes, then coolly said, " Maybe, Son, she didn't get the

fax ."