Dealing with 3-4 year olds
The Preschoolers come as a package of smartness, eagerness, naughtiness and few other behaviours, which makes it difficult to handle them unless the parents learn to negotiate and get even more smarter than the kids. Parents have to learn the flexibility manthra as their kids grow...they cannot behave the same way with their kids as they were an year ago...as kids grow, the elders have to grow as parents to the next stage every year !
Kids at 3-4 years of age learn to get through difficult situations, like dealing with tough elders like teachers, negotiating with parents and older siblings, achieving success by behaving rigidly many times etc. Agreements and Win-Win situations are impossible and tough when the elders dont want to make things easier, as both the parties are adamant. Children are not experts, they learn things from others or their survival struggles teach them certain behaviours at times, which are power battles at home or disappointments and tantrums.
Patience is what the parents need, not what the children can learn at this stage. It is a smart technique to research about every stage-wise behaviour of children when someone becomes a parent...doing this, it becomes easy to handle kids at every changing stage and things wouldnot be shocking. Forget about the word 'comparison' atall....never dream of having an ideal child..and dont get depressed and overwhelmed when your child behaves differently than what you dreamt of. Dont compare them with other so-called 'ideal children'.
Children learnt to negotiate at this age, it is not only an indication that he or she is learning to express his/her own ideas, it also shows that he/she is discovering how to co-exist and work better with another person or as a team. Complimenting a child in public is a good thing, sametime, commenting or complaining publicly has wrong impacts...children may seem to ignore discussins among adults at times, but they observe and lend an ear always...they maynot be hurt as such, but they will tend to behave the same way you complained of the next time. Teach your child to express certain feelings to you personally instead of shouting out loud in public...encourage them to appreciate others by never wrongly commenting on others, yourselves as they like following parents mostly.
Remember always, with 3-4 year olds, their behaviour is a reflection of your personality...you change and thet will change, for good or for bad....loosing temper quickly teaches them to do the same, starting with you ! Dealing with 3-4 year olds becomes a breeze when you are patient and happy always,,,else it becomes so easy to vent out your frustration on them and the next day, they will do the same to everyone around ! Deal smartly with them.